The Ultimate Gift Remembered This Holiday Season! The Gift Of Life

A few weeks ago I came across a photo on my computer that just melted my heart. I was flipping through my feed and came across a photo of a man being hugged by a man and a woman and there were tears streaming down their faces. I immediately noticed that they each had a stethoscope on and were listening to the man’s chest. I then read the caption of the post that stated, “Parents listen to their son’s transplanted heart beat in the chest of the recipient of his gift. There is only one race. The Human race”. I was immediately brought to tears as I looked at this picture and could see and feel the pain in the eyes of these parents. I couldn’t imagine how I would feel if this had happened to one of my children. I thought what a selfless gift they had passed on to someone. I felt the love and gratitude in the recipients face. I kept saying to myself, what a beautiful picture! I immediately shared this post on my facebook page so that others could see this amazing moment captured on camera. Little did I know what would happen next.

I checked on that post a few times that day and it was getting an amazing response. Others also felt the love and emotion of this photo and were reacting to it. What happened next was not expected at all. I received a message from a gentleman named Joshua Shetterly. Here is a screen shot of the actual message.

I was so amazed and honored that this gentleman took the time to reach out to me about his brother. I couldn’t believe what a small world we lived in. A friend of Joshua’s had tagged him in the post when she recognized the picture. I knew immediately that I wanted to hear more. Joshua and I messaged back and forth and soon we set up a zoom meeting so that he could share his late brothers story. This one is tear jerker so get ready and grab your tissues!

In 2014, 19 year old Matthew Shetterly was living with his parents Michael and Barbara, and 23 year old twin brothers Jarred and Joshua. He had recently moved back into his childhood home after being released from a 218 day incarceration. Initially Matthew was doing well, and was continuing on a clean path following a drug addiction that he battled prior to his incarceration. About a month after being home, Matthew was asked to help sell drugs in the Baltimore area. He saw an opportunity to make a lot of money and couldn’t resist the offer. Once he began selling drugs, he also fell back into the temptation of using heroin.

27 days following his release, Matthew was found overdosed in his Maryland home. Having dealt with this in the passed his parents had access to Narcan and administered it as soon as they found him. He was rushed to the hospital and was released later that evening. Coincidentally Joshua, Matthew’s older brother was in EMT school at the time and was doing ride alongs. Joshua stated that he felt embarrassed at the time that the fire department responding to his brothers OD would see him there. He briefly ran down the street to avoid running into any of them, but quickly knew he had to be there for his family and his brother.

The following day while Joshua was taking an EMT test, he got a call from his father. Matthew’s father had found him in his bedroom unresponsive with a heroin needle sticking out of his arm. He was frantic and again called 911, administered Narcan, and this time had to begin CPR. Matthew was rushed to the hospital where Joshua and his twin Jarred were working that day. Everyone knew this was the twin’s younger brother Matthew, and the ER team worked as hard as they possibly could to save their brother. To no avail, Matthew ended up on life support in the ICU for a week following his second OD.

This was April 2014. After a week of being on life support there were no improvements in Matthew’s condition and the time had come to cease life support. The family was approached about organ donation. Coincidentally it was also organ donation month in Maryland. The family made the selfless decision to help save someone else life. They agreed to donate whatever organs they could. Matthew died on Good Friday, April 18th, 2014. They harvested his heart, lungs, kidneys, pancreas, and liver. 4 people were able to have these organs transplanted into them. One of which was his heart. His heart was transplanted on Easter Sunday.

Nearly two years later after grieving and learning to live with the loss of a child, Matthews parents had a request. They desperately wanted to see if they could meet any of the recipients that received Matthew’s organs. They asked their son Joshua if he would right a letter to the organ donation center Living Legacy. A few weeks later they got a response. A gentleman by the name of Erv Baston wanted to meet the family. He was the recipient of Matthews heart. The family was elated!! After some scheduling conflicts, they heard that Erv and his family were available on the second Saturday of July. The family was so excited to meet Erv, yet at the same time still felt very lost and torn about the loss of Matthew. It was days later when they looked at the calendar and realized that the second Saturday of July was July, 16 2016 which would have been Matthew’s 21st birthday.

Erv Baston, the 51 year old heart recipient struggled with the idea that someone had to die in order to save his life and it tormented his mind. He wanted to meet Matthew’s family in hopes of finding a way to overcome the guilt that he was feeling. The families ultimately needed each other! Erv also has twin daughters just like the Shetterly’s have twin sons. So this large group of parents and children all got together at the Living Legacy Foundation in Baltimore Maryland. The moment that Matthew”s parents pressed their stethoscope to Erv’s chest, they broke down and cried and trembled. This was the first time they have heard Matthews heart beat since that awful day almost two years ago. These families still remain in touch, Erv is doing well, and they continue to heal one another.

My heart breaks for the Shetterly’s. I can not even begin to imagine what the loss of a child feels like. Nor do I ever want to. But what I do know is that this family is strong and heroic. They continue to share their son’s memory and educate people on the dangers of drug abuse. At the same time they help educate about the importance of organ donation.

Hold your loved ones tight this holiday season and all year. Take a moment and slow down. Put your head on your loved one’s chest and listen to their heart beat and be thankful and present in the moment.